Nailing this first anime review: Nyaruko-san 1-4

Nyaruko-san 1: We’re introduced to our main characters Nyaruko and Mahiro. Nyaruko is the Japanese Lovecraftian deity and she really likes Japanese cartoons. Mahiro is her love interest (at first sight) who she has decided to protect.

Nyaruko-san 2: We visit R’lyeh. Cthuko, the Living Flame is introduced who brings a touch of yuri to the show. And it turns out that the denizens or R’lyeh kidnap boys to act in Yaoi dramas against their will.

Nyaruko-san 3: Shit happens at school. Nyaruko’s brother appears and tries and fails to settle a grudge against his sister.

Nyaruko-san 4: Shouta Hastur is introduced to the audience and she also happens to be Nyaruko’s childhood friend. Mahiro’s mum decides to let the Lovecraftian Gods stay at her house. Isn’t she nice?


What I went in expecting: Same humour as the 5 minute skits

What I got: It’s the same humour but it would have been far better if I had never learned about the twisted universe.


You know what? I was damn surprised by all the asspain about how the Lovecraftian Gods were raped and I mean that figuratively. Nyarlathotep is a hyper-active girl. Cthugha is the raging lesbian. Hastur is a yellow-haired shouta.


I suppose that’s the reaction of every dedicated fan when they hear that their hero/book was put under the OtaKnife and given a Japanese Genderbender Treatment. But this show was nothing new, they were technically broadcasting this as a series of 5 minute anime shorts in the past 3 years and things were awfully quiet back then. Perhaps it was a sign of how unpopular they were? I wasn’t familiar with Lovecraft or Nyarlathotep when I started watching but I came to love the series for the characters and the jokes.


So having seen the old series, I knew part and parcel of what I was in for. There would be slapstick (the abusive fork), there would be yuri jokes (Cthuko) and Nyaruko would be energetic to the point of driving you insane. She also liked anime and preferred anime to putting on performances which would drive audience insane and cause them to scream for weeks. I believed that if a 5 minute skit was good, a 24 minute sitcom would be better. The LN seemed like my kind of comedy, I thought I would be better prepared for this. But even I was in for a sucker punch.


Within 5 minutes of the first episode, we quickly get details of the world in which Nyarlathotep comes from. Everyone up there from Mr Tentacles to Mr Living Flame is watching anime, playing game and imports (illegally) DVDs from Earth. They consider Earth Entertainment and more Japan’s to be the best. I knew that there was fanwank based on the web series but this took fanwank, strapped it onto a Apollo rocket and launched it to Mars. Cthuko at one point even says that they had game consoles where ever she came from but Earth consoles were considered better. The fanwank would not be for everyone. Coming from 5 minute skits which didn’t have all that much ‘Anime Strong’, I was shocked by just how much fanwank this anime and the LN has.


The other detail worth mentioning is that Nyaruko is part of a inter-galactic police organisation and she chases after rogue aliens. There’s some maho shoujo elements mixed in as these Elder Gods politely take their scuffle to some nether dimension where the cloud is always red. Although, I don’t care about the Alien Cop main plot (or is it side plot?). The action scenes aren’t something worth mentioning beyond beam spam. Speaking of beam spam, buy Sins of a Solar Empire Rebellion.


The comedy boils down to Nyaruko making a move on Mahiro, Mahiro gets annoyed and rejects it, Cthuko makes a move on Nyaruko and Nyaruko gets annoyed. Yeah, I get some chuckles but I feel as though the comedy needs a shake-up soon. The character-based and slapstick stuff is starting to dry. When it comes to getting laughs from yours truly, I believe the second web series was superior. It took the material and gave me laughs from the episode when Cthuko, the Living Flame tries to get a job (and her last resort is a gas station) to the faux-fanservice episode where the characters mocked the audience for expecting tits and the comedy came from the dialogue, not the visuals.


Other Comments: It wasn’t too long ago this year that I brought a compendium of Lovecraft’s selected work. Bloody hell, why didn’t I start reading his stuff two years ago? And contact NASA and tell them broadcast ‘Irony by Claris’ to the stars. Maybe the reason aliens have not contacted us is that they don’t have a ear for Mozart?


What’s going on at ABC3?

I really wasn’t in the mood for doing anything so after I was done with Master Chef All Stars, so I decided to flick over to ABC3. Right I thought, maybe there might be something interesting to watch. And on air, was another episode of the Legend of Dick and Dom; a Brit show aimed at kids about these guys who looked like they might have been from Medieval England. Now this show isn’t on my to watch list but I was able to understand what was going on thanks to the handy summary. The heroes of the series were two pommie men, a monk and a obligatory female are on some kind of quest. This week, our not so glorious travellers were trying to find a fruit from a lost tribe. The twist is that they are actually little kids and they acted with a kiddies’ mentality.

The trend among some Western kids’ shows is to incorporate kiddies rebelliousness. By that I mean, the small problems like staying up late and yucky vegetables. For me then, watching this was damn awkward. I don’t remember being a picky eater so I’m at odds with the kids tribe. Even if I shrunk back to my mini-me, I would not be able to find common ground with these kids on screen when it comes to food.

  1. The kids find Broccoli yuck and it’s a ‘forbidden word’

Dude, no! Eating broccoli is awesome. The best part about it is when those lovely green bristles at the top of the plant rolls along the roof of your mouth. It’s like a massage in your mouth. I usually have my broccoli boiled but since kids like crunch, I would take a few tips from top bloke and celebrity chef Jamie Oliver and make a broccoli tempura.

  1. No fruits allowed in the tribe

Oh come on. If you like sweet things, eat berries. I would recommend all of them. There’s nothing better as the sweetness of strawberries bursts in your moth as you feel the texture of the fruit roll in your tongue. Like it sour? Eat your oranges. Or you can go one step further and make a Fruit Tart.

  1. They only eat hot chips

I used to like hot chips but I got sick of them. Almost every dish were served with 30 more chips then my small stomach can handle. And they always gave me, a weeklong annoying sore on my lips. Nowadays, whenever I order a hamburger for a lunch on the move I would not order it as a meal. I still eat hot chips but only as a rare treat. And how did those two dudes not manage to cook chips? It isn’t too hard to cut up a potato into chunks and toss it into frying oil. Unless the kiddie tribe is even dumber then humanly possible

  1. Mashed potato ‘ruins potatoes’

I don’t know how kids manage to not like this! If prepared properly as in no more lumpy bits left, mashed potato is a creamy meal that melts in your mouth with a silky, smooth texture with all the deliciousness of a white potato. And don’t throw it around! Kids should be slapped for wasting this fucking awesome side dish!

Well there it is. Remember, always slap your kids if they don’t eat their vegies. But if you’re too kind to do that use Method 2. Glad wrap it and serve it for breakfast. If they don’t eat breakfast, glad wrap it again and serve it for lunch. And repeat it again until they eat their damn vegetables. Don’t give up! Remember when you’re a parent of a kid, they’ve got to learn who’s boss and more importantly what’s good for them.

Other Comments: I haven’t tried making a fruit tart yet but cooking shows and eating are one of my many passions. As for ABC3, there are some shows that I find watchable such as the Marvel Cartoons. Anime does get broadcast but someone higher up seems to have decided to broadcast selections from the shoujo genre; Fruit Basket, Ouran High School and Vampire Knight. Maybe one day they’ll start broadcasting dubbed K-On? Can’t be too hard to fool someone outside the fandom into believing it was aimed at girls.